An Epic Battle: Ron Weasley vs Technology
by Lady Jarine
Summary: Ron and Hermione made a promise to Harry at the end of HBP that they would be there with him at the Dursleys.  Unfortunately, they forgot one thing: Ron and muggle technology don't get along too well.
1. Prologue

**AN: Some people might say that I have only put this up here because I haven't updated Lost and I don't want Little Lily Granger to be mad at me. Well, those people are only somewhat right. I also thought it would be funny. Some might argue that this will slow down my updates of Lost. To those people I say, "How can you slow down an absolute standstill in production?" And no, I don't plan on going and periodically deleting chapters off Lost, so we're good.**

**Ps. I don't own Harry Potter. I do, however, own two pieces of paper saying that on the 21****st****, I will own two copies of book seven. WOOT!**

**Prologue**

"_We'll be there, Harry," said Ron._

_"What?"_

_"At your aunt and uncle's house," said Ron. And then we'll go with you, wherever you're going."_

_-Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, p. 607, UK edition_

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley of number 4 Privet Drive were very unhappy. As if it wasn't bad enough that their abnormal nephew, Harry, had dared to show his face at their house after the incident with Professor Dumbledore the previous year, he had had the nerve to bring two of his freaky friends to number four and insisted that they were staying until his birthday. Needless to say, the Dursleys were not too keen on this idea, but after being informed that Harry's two friends were considered of age and therefore were legally allowed to do magic outside of school, they reluctantly agreed that they could stay until the end of July.

_Very_ reluctantly.

Luckily for the Dursleys, the trio mostly kept out of their way. They could usually be found up in their nephew's room, talking in hushed voices, planning something. From what Mr. and Mrs. Dursley had heard, it sounded like they were planning some sort of overly-elaborate scavenger hunt. A very secret scavenger hunt.

All in all, the Dursleys were quite glad when the opportunity came for them to leave the house. Coming back to find out the three magically inclined young hooligans had blown up their house was a small price to pay for a few days away from the freaks. One of Mr. Dursley's co-workers had invited the family to come camping for the weekend. Under normal circumstances, Mr. and Mrs. Dursley would never have forced their son, Dudley, to go for a whole weekend without television, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

So on Friday evening, the Dursleys packed up their car and left, hoping that their house would still be their when they returned on Monday afternoon.

Suckers.

**Yeah, it's short, but it's just to set up the story. I should have the first chapter up soon. Actual soon, not procrastinator soon. But don't quote me on that, I might end up working this summer. So guess what time it is!**

**If you guessed 'time to review', then you are correct!**

**Go on, you know you want to.**

**The button is right there.**

**It looks oh so inviting.**

**It's practically begging you to click it.**

**Ok, I'll stop now.**


	2. Chapter 1: Ron vs the Lava Lamp

**Chapter One**

**Ron Weasley vs. the Lava Lamp**

The Dursleys hadn't been gone for an hour before the trouble started. The trio sat in Harry's room, trying to decide where the four remaining Horcruxes would most likely be found, what protections were likely to be surrounding them, and, most importantly, how in the world they were supposed to destroy them. So far, they hadn't had much luck.

"Well, the diary was at Hogwarts, so maybe there's more hidden there." Harry was starting to get frustrated. They had been at the Dursley's for just over a week, and they were still no closer to destroying Voldemort and his Horcruxes.

"The diary was only at Hogwarts because Mr. Malfoy put it in Ginny's book," Hermione pointed out. "I doubt that he would willingly put a piece of his soul in the one place he never dared to take over in the first war."

"But the Death Eaters have already gotten into Hogwarts once, right? Who's to say they haven't moved some of the Horcruxes there?"

"But Ron, there's got to be loads of protection on all of them. I doubt Voldemort- oh, for heaven's sake, stop flinching, Ron! I doubt he'd want to go to the trouble of moving something that's already so well protected." Ron slumped back against the cushion he was sitting against. Why did Hermione always have to be right?

Draining the last of his glass of water, Ron stood up. "Be back in a minute." He left the room and went down the hall to the bathroom. On his way back, he saw a strange light coming from Harry's cousin's room. He paused, with his hand on the doorknob. Was it really right to go into someone's room without permission? Then, remembering all Harry had told him and Hermione about how horrible his cousin was to him, he opened the door and went in.

Ron located the source of the strange glow right away. It was emanating from a rounded glass tube, with bits of plastic at the top and bottom, and a long, black cord connecting it to the wall. Ron knew enough from his Dad's muggle-themed rants to know that this was a lamp of some sort, but he had never seen anything like this before. Blobs of different sizes traveled up the cylinder at different speeds and slowly drifted back down to the base, where they merged with the other blobs. They then broke apart to form new blobs, each of which then rose to the top in the same ritual dance.

Ron didn't know how long he sat there watching the strange lamp before he realized something was wrong. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't look away. The mesmerizing movements of the blobs had him spellbound. He tried to call for help, but found he had no voice. He was clearly being held captive by this strange lamp.

And then, he heard, as if from a great distance, someone calling his name. Ron snapped out of his trance, and, knowing he had only seconds to make his move before the lamp reclaimed him, grabbed it and threw it out the open window. The lamp made a satisfying crash as it hit the driveway, and the blobs and the weird liquid that suspended them splashed out in a magnificent starburst in and around the shattered glass.

Harry and Hermione ran in through the door. "Ron, are you OK? We were trying to call you and then we heard the crash…" Harry then looked out the window. There was a long pause.

"Ron? Why did you throw Dudley's lava lamp out the window?"

"It was hypnotizing me!" Ron protested.

Harry sighed, knowing that there would be some serious explaining to do when the Dursleys got home. "Why did Dudley have a lava lamp in the first place?" Hermione wondered.

"Dudley is a very strange boy," was all Harry said by way of a reply.

**AN: Two chapters in one day! A new record! I was sitting at the computer desk wondering what to write and I spent ten minutes staring at my sister's lava lamp. Thus, chapter one was born! So anyways, the score is now at Ron: 1, Technology: 0. Yay Ron!**

**Thanks very very very much to the people who have reviewed already! I'm sorry the first chapter was so short, but it really was just a prologue. The chapters will probably all be around this length, give or take a bit. I'm sorry if you think that's way too short, but I don't want to stretch it out too much, or else it won't be as good. Which would be bad.**

**So, anyways, review please!**


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